Dearest Lady Friends,
First off, if you’re easily offended by sex words or cussing, then please hop along, my pretty. This particular post delves into my experiences with a Power Essence I call Hot Pants. (And with a name like that, it has to be scandalous.)
You still here, Dirty Diana?
Sooooo I woke up this morning with the most incredible sex hangover. So completely overwhelmed and heated with lust that I thought someone had plugged my libido into a nuclear power plant, and turned the dial up to ‘Burn Baby Burn.’
You see, the ex and I got together last night for a movie watching marathon.
The last time we did this (last week, in fact) it was a cordial, sex-free night. Just friends hanging out, having a jolly good time. And I was actually content with this arrangement. I enjoy his company, even without the bumping and grinding. I thought for sure this would be our new normal, and I was perfectly okay with that.
But this week for movie night, I decided to add something different to the equation.
Four sprays of Hot Pants, to be exact. (Right before I left the house.)
Now to make things clear, Hot Pants hadn’t been on my radar lately because I haven’t been in a sensuous mood. I wasn’t really in a sensuous mood last night either, to be honest with you. I more or less just sprayed it on to see what would happen.
Anyway, I felt good while driving over there. I wasn’t seething with passion, but I was happy to be seeing him.
We ate dinner. Then we laid down in the family room to watch the movie. He was at the end of my feet, so basically my toes were wedged under his back. It was close, but nothing that indicated hot sex coming to a theater near you.
After the movie, he came and laid beside me.
From there it was a whole lot of rubbing and ‘stuff’ I hadn’t experienced in a couple of months. The thing I remember the most is that it was VERY intense.
I mean, I’m a woman who knows how to derive massive quantities of pleasure from intercourse, but even I was shocked by the feverish nature of our session. I’m talking Top 3 sexual encounter of my life, here. Mind officially blown.
It was straight from the Friend Zone to a pile of clothes in
10 3 seconds flat.
Funny enough, when I was creating Hot Pants, I thought about naming it Orgasm in a Bottle because that’s precisely what the energy felt like.
Today I’m thinking I was spot on with that original name idea.
Hot Pants — the gift that keeps on giving
So like I said, this morning I woke up with this sex hangover. My mind could barely focus on anything except getting more sex.
Don’t get me wrong… I have always had a healthy sexual appetite, but this desire was over-the-top even for me. I had been more than satisfied the previous night, so this incessant thirst just seemed… well, excessive!
Basically, I have no other choice but to blame it on that gosh-for-saken Hot Pants.
I won’t change the name to Orgasm in a Bottle, but dammit, if it’s not living it to that ideal. This stuff brings out the horny — BIG TIME.
And no, this isn’t love or let’s get married or ‘lets-make-things-the-way-they-were.’ This is straight up bang, bang, bang. This is get naked first, figure shit out later.
Sometimes we NEED more yang than yin, and Hot Pants does a marvelous job at bringing massive quantities of yang.
They say the hips don’t lie, but let me tell you something… the plants don’t lie either!
I texted him this morning and told him how I was feeling, using the most explicit terms my mind could conjure. As I was typing the text, I kept thinking how heavy handed it sounded. I used to send him naughty teasers before, but this text was the stuff XXX porn was made of. I was almost shocked at what I was typing considering how content I was with just friendship.
He’s at work till tomorrow morning, so there’s little I can do to re-live that loving feeling today. (Though he did make a few lovely suggestions.)
By then Hot Pants will probably be back to old leggings on the sofa.
Though who knows.
I guess you’ll have to stay tuned for another episode of Power Essence Chronicles.
Until then, I invite you to try a bottle of Hot Pants. Your libido will thank you in the morning.